The 2nd time around I'll know better.

So says the poor bloke who stepped into my office to wreak havoc on my peace of mind this afternoon. The man is 44 years old and really believes he has life figured out. Today, he decided he would pass on some of his acquired 'wisdom' to me. This is what I got out of it:

1. You will not marry the one you are with when you are 23 years old.

2. IF you happen to beat the odds and get hitched, don't worry, it won't last.

3. The longer you are alone the better you'll be with someone.

4. We should always take the easy route. Why run 70 miles when you could run 40?

5. Something magical happens when you are 35 - you wake up knowing exactly what you want.

6. Being enamored with someone is a bad thing.

7. If you are a woman under the age of 30, you must be unrealistic, obsessive, and blinded by idealism.

I could go on... and on... but I won't. Clearly, you can see that the man is a genius. He should write a book, or 10 of them, on how to be the ultimate douche bag by preying on young adults to avoid your own insecurities.

I will admit this is a bit of a harsh post, but after being patronized by such a person, I fear I lack the self control to not be affected by it. First, it was frustration and defeat. Then, confident and thankful. Lastly, empathetic and sad. This man was tearing down my ideals, and my belief that I can actually veer away from statistics and be the exception and not the rule. When I get married one day, it will be forever. The plan is to every day be a woman that is deserving of the man who promises himself to me, to respect him, to love and support him, and continue to grow with and invest in that relationship as long as I walk this earth. That is my plan, and there is no plan B, no backup - nothing. If I get married tomorrow, or in 10 years, that plan will not change.

All of that was going through my mind and as soon as he left the office I felt horrible for him. I'm sure he didn't plan to get divorced, and I'm sure that everything in his life is exactly how he would have wanted it because admitting that it wasn't would be far more difficult, far more vulnerable. I am sad that he thinks what he lived has to be the norm and that it can't ever be improved on. I'm sad that he feels like a marriage of 40 years is greater than one that is 70 years because it is easier.

Him and his new wife have 4 kids combined. I sincerely hope that one of them grows up to show him another way, a better one.